My deepest feelings
by Moonofthedarknight
Summary: Bloom feels weird. Something strange is following her and it makes her feel down... Will she be able to defeat this weird feeling?
1. Chapter 1

my deepest feelings...

... feelings I don't tell, I tell it to nobody, I hardly ever talk out them. They are there

most people think I'm a determined and mostly friendly and happy girl. Maybe I am the first

two but the last one I can't be always. I try to hide my deepest feelings by making fun,

laughing and other happy stuff. But somewhere in my heart there's sadness, misery and other

non-happy stuff. Which gets bigger every time somebody says something really mean or rude.

I try not to show It, I stay happy. and then, what comes? A day I don't wanna be happy. Everybody thinks it's weird cuz normally I'm happy and cheerful. Then those days,

I just feel pain and I feel I wanna cry. crying just for nothing. But I can't. Friends are

asking then:

"What's wrong?"

I can't answer properly, I say: "nothing Is wrong, I'm fine", which I'm actually not. I dunno

what's wrong myself. I just feel like being non-happy.

They care about me, but then I feel that nobody can help how hard they try. I just want to

be left alone for some time, but yet I need somebody...

Chapter one 

My name Is Bloom. I'm a fairy and owner of the dragon fire. I have long fire red hair, and

heavenly blue eyes. I'm a member of a girls gang at the school Alfea, school for fairies.

There's, Stella, Flora, Musa, Tecna and Layla.

I have a bunny, Kiko and a boyfriend, his name Is Sky, more about him later. I'm adopted by a nice couple from earth In a little village, Gardenia. Thanks to my older sister, Daphne, I'm still alive. Now I'm searching for a way to find my real parents back, which hasn't succeeded yet. Originally I come from Domino

Well, let's talk more about my boyfriend, erm... He's nice, has cute blue eyes and long

blonde hair. When I'm close to him, I try to forget my problems. He's prince of Eraklyon

And of course I have my Winx friends. Stella is my best friend and the first fairy I met.

She's a shopping freak, likes boys and also has a boyfriend, his name Is Brandon. He has

dark brown eyes and hair. Together they look very sweet. She's from Solaria.

Then you have Flora, shy, friendly, a true and loyal friend. She also has a boyfriend, his

name is Helia. He has long black hair (even longer then sky's) and really intend eyes.

He can be very confusing and mystic... maybe that's what flora likes about him. She is

from Linphea.

Musa, is well, kind of big-mouthed, Inconstant and Indifferent. Yet she has a emotional side.

She's together with Riven, even though they haven't really told each other that they like each

other. But we all know. Her home planet Is Melody.

Our Tecna is the smartest of the group. She's very logical and knows everything about

technologic things. She also doesn't talk a lot about her feelings. That's why Timmy

fits so good with her. He's kind of like her. Tecna Is from Zenith.

The last one Is Layla. She's very sportive and loves to dance. she acts mostly strong but

Inside she's scared, not that something's wrong with it. Everybody can be scared of things.

even me, I'm afraid of lotsa things. Andros is her planet. She's together with Nabu.

Now, I'll tell you how It began...

"I want you to leave me alone!" I yelled to sky. I threw a pillow to his head.

"What's so suddenly wrong with you?" he asked.

"Nothing!" I yelled once again, "Just leave!"

"Ok, ok." he mumbled and left.

After he was gone, I busted out of tears, nobody was around and if it would be, I wouldn't

care about it. All the girls left for a day. I said I would come, after I finished my work.

Suddenly he stood there. Sky. Some days earlier I tried to avoid him. I didn't want to talk.

I think he knew what I was trying to do, so he took his chance. He came in and tried to

talk with me. I told him I didn't want to talk. He thought he had something to do with it.

I told him that it's not true. But he came closer, hugged me and asked: "Are you sure?"

I blushed but told him again that he has nothing to do with it. Then he asked me If I had someone else. "No!" I shrieked then. I couldn't believe he thought about such things. I love him, I still do, but like I said before, I have my days...

He didn't believe me. He asked again. Then I yelled...

For hours I laid on my bed. Thinking of what's wrong. Thinking about a part of the puzzle

to make me complete that's missing. Everywhere In my room laid handkerchiefs spread around. My face was wet of crying. I heard a sound of a door opening. Quickly I jumped from my bed. I collected the handkerchiefs and threw them quickly away in the waste bin. I whipped some last teardrops of my face and tried to smile, even though it was all fake.

The girls came in. "Where were you? We were waiting for you!" shouted Stella Irritated.

"Sorry" I tried to apologise myself. I totally forgot about it. "I'm just done with my

work." I lied. I couldn't tell them the truth. "They won't understand me." I thought.

The others left, accept Flora, cuz I share my room with her. We kept looking at each other

for some time until she said two simply words: "You cried."

"No I didn't." I lied again.

"Your eyes are red."

"Oh, that's nothing, just from an allergy." I replied. Lying again. Flora didn't ask anything

else. I was glad that she believed it. Maybe she didn't but I didn't care.

Later, bedtime. I couldn't sleep. I was still thinking about my feelings and I was sorry

that I yelled at sky. I felt sick. Sick Inside. Weird feelings in my stomach. I looked at

Flora. She was asleep and wasn't about to wake up.

I got out of my bed and went to my desk. I simply took a sheet of paper and a pen.

I wrote on the letter: "Dear Sky."

I thought: "Is this a good Idea?" I wrote some other things. It took me the whole night. It wasn't much but that didn't matter. When the light of clear sun came up, I was ready. I putted it in an envelope and hid it under some books. I felt a lot better. I dressed up and wanted to get my stuff for school today, but by accident, all kinds of stuff fell over. Flora got awake. "Sorry!" I said.

"It's ok." she replied. She looked at her watch. "I was about to get up soon anyway."

I smiled weak. A little bit of my sadness remained, but not enough to be down. That day

I was back my own happy me. I laughed and made fun with my friends. We had a great time

like everyday. I forgot about my problems and all the rest. Then In the late afternoon, a

girl came running to me. "Sky Is here," she said, "He asked for you."

I was shocked and replied to her that I would be there in a minute. I ran to my room and

took out the letter I wrote last night. I looked at it and then out of my window.

I saw Sky waiting on his windrider. He had his helmet in his hands. I ran downstairs and almost bumped into somebody.

When I was out of the building I started walking again. I was kinda

out of breath but I didn't show It. I came closer and he saw me. "Bloom..." he started.

I laid my finger on his mouth and gave him the letter, turned around and left. Confused

he looked after me with his blue eyes. When I got back Inside In the building I sighted and

ran to my room. I looked outside...

-sky pov-

"Why did she just do that?" I thought. I opened the letter and started to read. there stood:

"Dear sky,

I'm sorry about yesterday. I was kind of In a bad mood. I dunno why I was so angry suddenly.

I feel strange the last time. It's like nobody can help me. I think I need to solve this

myself. I hope you can forgive me. It's not your fault of somebody else...

goodbye."

After I read It, I stared in front of me, put my helmet on again and left. The whole

trip to red fountain I had to think of what she wrote. She says It's all her fault...

-Bloom pov-

I was glad that that was over. Days passed by and I didn't hear a single thing of Sky.

My sad feelings grew. The girls saw that I wasn't my happy self anymore.

Stella couldn't see me suffering anymore and she asked: "What's wrong? You know you can

always count on me..."

I didn't want to reply so I did like I didn't hear her. With her sunny brown eyes she looked

worried at me. "Is this about Sky?" she asked.

Water got Into my eyes and I said: "No."

I left. I walked, looking down. I didn't want to see a thing. I felt miserable, alone...

My feet brought me to my favourite place. A place that nobody knows and where I can be alone. I started to cry and I hid my face in my hands. After a good time crying I got up and anger was bursting out of me. I hit with my fist a wall. Tears were flowing from my eyes.

Sometime later I got back In my room. I stared at the ceiling. Doing nothing. all my

friends were very worried. Every time they asked me what was wrong, I ignored them or I

replied that nothing's wrong. Why do they always wonder what's wrong? I couldn't help it myself. This weird feeling hurt so much. I didn't know where it came from and how to get rid of it. Even my magic wasn't what it was. I thought I should just forget everything. That everything would be fine afterwards... but it wouldn't...


	2. Chapter 2

chapter two

It was night. I got awake. 3 AM. The last few nights I didn't sleep that well anymore.

I pulled my blanked over my head, trying to catch some sleep. Then suddenly my mind was

clear. I thought about leaving. I got those thoughts of running off, going and not coming

back for a while. "What am I thinking?" I thought, "I must be losing my mind." I got

up anyway. I walked to the bathroom and looked into the mirror. I got some lines under my eyes.

"Must be from crying and not sleeping." I thought. The shape of my face changed into Sky's.

I was shocked and then, in a burst of anger I slapped into the mirror. It shattered into

thousands of pieces. After it got through of me, I saw that my hand was bleeding. Quickly I took a towel and putted my hand in it. I even didn't feel the pain. No. I felt pain but not that

kind of. Only pain Inside. The door of the bathroom got opened. The girls stood there. After they heard the clinging of the glass they got up and went looking.

"OMG!! BLOOM!" shrieked Musa.

"I'm fine." I said with a weak smile.

"Are you crazy?!" shouted Flora freaking out, "You're bleeding!"

"You have to go to the school nurse." said Tecna.

They pulled me with them and we went to the nurses office.

Shocked she asked: "Bloom, what have you done to your hand?!"

"There was an annoying fly and I tried to kill it but I hit the mirror instead." I lied.

"This is the most stupid tale, like they would ever believe It." I thought.

"Anyway," said the nurse, "We have to look after that hand."

The other girls left. I remained there with the nurse. While she was getting some pieces of

glass out of my hand, she asked: "What did there really happened?"

I looked at her. "like I said." I replied cool. She looked at me, just like she was looking through me, but she didn't say a thing.

She putted some bandage around my hand and said then: "Come back tomorrow to change of

bandage."

I nodded and left...

When I got out of the nurses office, the others already warned Layla cuz she sleeps in

another dorm. She hugged me and asked if I was fine. I nodded and said I was tired, so we

left and went back sleeping. For the first time in a long time I was able to sleep nice.

The day moved on but then, when It was evening my cell phone ringed. I picked it up and

said: "Hello."

"Hi bloom, It's me, sky." said a voice.

"Oh hi." I said cool. I couldn't believe he ringed me after so many days

"Sorry I didn't call you before," he said, "but the lessons were really rough and I barely

had time."

"It's ok." I answered short. even he apologised, I still was angry. Maybe not really angry

but really disappointed. My feeling made me angry.

"So what have you done lately?" he asked

"Nothing special..." I replied.

"Oh, I see... Is It ok if I come right now?"

"Do whatever you like."

"Ok... I'll be there in some minutes. cya."

"Bye."

I threw away my cell phone.

A few minutes later Sky showed up in my room. "Hey, Bloom..." he started. He looked at my

hand. "What happened?" he asked worried.

"Oh nothing, I hit the mirror by accident."

"OMG!"

"I'm fine. really."

we talked a bit and later he left. he didn't even kiss me goodbye. Like he usual does.


	3. Chapter 3

chapter 3

I watched the clouds drifting away at my favourite spot. Things still didn't go better.

Things got worse. My points on school were bad, my friends didn't talk to me, maybe cuz they didn't know what to say or what to do with the situation. Of course we still were together. My mood was different at time to time. Then that day I took my decision. my bunny Kiko was already with my parents and Lockette was with them. That night I took my stuff and ran away. Not to my home in gardenia. No. I simply ran away, through the forest next to the school. I ran away of everything. My friends, my problems and my biggest love. Now that I tell it, I think I must have been out my mind then. Anyway I didn't care what I left behind.

'Just keep going' repeated something inside again and again. I dunno how long I ran.

I guess until my feet hurt. I got hungry so I ate some bread I took before I left. There

was a soft breeze. It made me feel good, but still not good enough to bring back my inner me.

A bit later I transported myself to another place. I didn't care where I was. as long as I

was gone for a while and nobody could Interrupt me. The place I was, had a lot of trees.

"Flora would lice it here." I thought. I looked at my watch and saw it was still early.

I couldn't believe it myself I ran away and thought of going back. But then, I fell

something on my shoulder... I shrieked and turned around. an older woman stood there.

"Are you too a victim of your emotions?" she simply asked.

I looked confusing at her. "What are you talking 'bout?" I replied.

"Don't do the same like I did." she said. Then she disappeared. "Wait!" I shouted,

"What do you mean?!"

But the woman was nowhere to be found. So I went back before somebody would see that I was gone. I didn't want them to be concerned. Even though I wasn't myself then, I didn't want

to hurt them with worries. When I got back to the dorm, I quietly hid my stuff I have taken with me and did like I was already dressed up. Flora's alarm clock went off. I just sat on my bed, watching her waking up. She looked at me and said then: "We really have to talk. This can't go on. Something's bothering you. Let us help you."

I shook my head and answered: "I dunno what's wrong myself." I stood up and left.

-Flora pov-

I was very worried. This already went on for days. Maybe already a week. But whatever we

said, it didn't get through her. we all wanted to help, but nothing seemed to work.

When she suffers, we all do. Her emotions are going wild and she has to get them back to

balance...


	4. Chapter 4

chapter 4

-Bloom pov-

My points were getting so bad, that Gisela came in the class and directed me to Faragonda,

the headmaster of Alfea. I didn't care that I had to go. I wouldn't tell her a single thing.

Not that I didn't want to, but just cuz I didn't know myself. After Gisela and I were

inside, Faragonda started: "I heard from several teachers that your points are lowering and

that you're not feeling good. Everybody Is concerned about you."

First I felt sad that they were concerned but then another burst of anger came out. I jumped

up and yelled: "I don't want anybody to be concern about me! I don't ask for your help."

Faragonda was like usual very calm and she pointed that I had to sit back down. I did what

she wanted. I felt immediately guilty that I shouted at the headmistress. She did so much for

me. "Bloom," she started, "If there's anything you want to talk about, you're always

welcome." I didn't say a word. I don't know how long we sat there, with nobody saying a

thing. But I surely had one thing on my mind. I had to see that woman again. I had to know

what she was talking about, what she meant. Finally I said: "I can't speak about things I

don't know myself." I got up and left. I ran away, again, I ran away from my problems.

It kept nibbling: 'Why do I feel that way? Why don't I let somebody help me? Why does It

hurt so much? What's wrong with me?'

A day later, I was laying on my bed again. The girls came in and sat on the edge of my bed.

"Bloom, you really need to talk about it, whatever it is." said Musa.

I was near to crying, I dunno why. I just wanted to cry and tell that nothing was going on.

They all thought that It had to do with Sky. Which wasn't true. I said them that I was fine.

again. They all looked at me and I started to cry. Stella hugged me.

"Please, you really need to say it." tried Tecna again.

While crying I told them everything. That I didn't feel that well inside. And that I didn't

know why. That I broke the mirror in a burst of anger. And as least It told them that I

couldn't handle my emotions any longer. While I was telling everything they didn't say a

word. It felt better to talk about It. Still it wasn't gone. I even told them that I was about to run away and that I meanwhile met that mysterious woman. She must know more about this. They told me that they would help me searching after that woman tomorrow, cuz it was already late. But I couldn't wait any longer. I had to know it. So that night I ran again. Without somebody knowing. I went to the weird place we first met.

"Hello!" I shouted. I hoped that she would appear. Sddenly she stood there in front of me.

now I could see her clearly. She had long black hair with some white straps in it. She

looked tired, but her grey eyes shined lively.

"You are back." she said.

"Yeah," I replied, "What did you mean before?"

"You're heart is being consumed by doubts. All those doubts changes into sadness and other

things which keeps you down. I too had that feeling. It was like I was falling into a black

hole, a hole where I couldn't get out."

"I feel the same. How do I get rid of it."

"Let your inner light shine with its power and let it guide you. Believe in that light and

the darkness will never defeat you or consume your heart ever again."

She left, again, just in a flash.

"Great." I mumbled. I went back, but when I did, Flora was already awake.

"Where were you?" she asked worried.

"I went looking for that woman myself and I think I found a way to get rid of all this.

just give me a day. I need to do this alone."

"Ok."

Even though I had no idea how to handle that. So I had to defeat the darkness in my heart.

"What to do now?" I though. What could I do? Then I had an Idea. There's a big library at

Alfea. Maybe I could find something there, I had to try. I didn't want to have this feeling

a day longer. When I got there, I saw miss Barbatea. She makes sure that all the books are

on the right place and knows everything about books and which one to find It.

"Miss, can I ask you a question?" I asked.

"Yes, go ahead."

"Do you know something more about darkness and how to get rid of It?"

She started to laugh. "My dear Bloom. If you should ask me, you know more about darkness then me. You and your friends fight a lot against It."

"Yeah I know, but this time it's different. Darkness in the heart."

"Oh, In that case, you should try that book on the shelf over there."

She pointed at a book with a red and black cover. I took it and looked in it. the first

sentence was:

"Until you focus on the Light you will always stumble around in the darkness of defeat."

That was a pretty weird sentence to begin a book, but true. I began to read in it. I slayed

all the words that were on the pages. Strong sentences went through my mind. I felt stronger.

Now I was sure that I could defeat the darkness. I putted the book back on the shelf and

went to my room.


	5. Chapter 5

chapter 5

Luckily nobody was there. I sat on my bed with my legs crossed and I

concentrated. I tried to connect with my inner me, like I read in the book. a sweat drop

ran from my face, but finally It worked. I saw myself wandering in a dark place with no

light. I tried to shriek for my friends but I couldn't say a thing. Just as the darkness was

about to swallow me, a little spark of light appeared. The light brightened and was so

strong I had to cover my eyes. When I opened my eyes I saw that the light was kind of

fighting against the darkness. "Please." I thought, "I don't want to feel like this for

forever."

The light was kind of loosing. A teardrop fell down of my cheek. "You have to win!" I yelled

"It's the only way to get rid of the darkness! I believe In you!"

The bright light got stronger and no shadow was left.

"Bloom." said a voice, "You did It. You managed to defeat one of the worst enemy of every

person. "Suddenly I was back in the normal world. I opened my eyes. Everything was so clear

for me. I felt a lot better. It was like a heavy thing was lifted from my shoulders.

Days passed by and everything was back as it was. I got back my happy and love feelings.

Now that I told you this story, there's one thing you really have to remember:

You can beat everything, as long as you keep believing...

* * *

I know it has a stupid ending... I couldn't think of anything else XD anyway... watch our for an update because this isn't the ending yet... 


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